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发信人: listens (do you offer?), 信区: Student
标 题: 布什3月18日电视讲话(转载)
发信站: 荔园晨风BBS站 (Thu Mar 20 12:53:55 2003), 站内信件
PRESIDENT'S TELEVISED ADDRESS GRANTING SADDAM HUSSEIN 48 HOURS TO STOP MISTAKING
THIS GEORGE BUSH FOR THAT OTHER SISSYPANTS CHICKEN QUITTER
Remarks by the President in Address to the Nation
The Cross Hall
THE PRESIDENT: My fellow citizens, events in Iraq have now reached the final da
ys of my willingness to keep my personal blood lust for Saddam Hussein in check.
For more than a decade, the United States and other nations have successfully c
rushed Iraq into the ground with crippling economic sanctions and almost-constan
t bombing of nearly half their worthless desert landscape. Yet today, Iraq's rul
ing regime remains in power, seemingly for no other reason than to rub my maniac
ally proud family's patrician honker in a big steaming loaf of its most humiliat
ing failure.
Twelve years ago, another American President named George Bush stormed into Iraq
on a noble mission of political expediency and petrochemical liberation. Today,
Saddam Hussein had better stop mistaking this George Bush with that one. For in
deed, we are two very different George Bushes. That George Bush grew up a Yankee
. That George Bush excelled in academics. That George Bush flew fighter jets in
actual combat. That George Bush started companies that were profitable. That Geo
rge Bush was elected to the Presidency. And that George Bush successfully forged
an international coalition to support his profit-motivated exploitation of the
United States Military. But you know what? When push came to shove, that George
Bush folded like a frickin' origami ballerina because he was too chicken to send
a few thousand worthless grunts into the mean streets of Baghdad for some down-
and-dirty, kill-for-the-hell-of-it whoopass.
Since then, the world has engaged in 12 years of diplomacy. We have passed more
than a dozen resolutions in the United Nations Security Council. We have sent hu
ndreds of weapons inspectors to oversee the disarmament of Iraq. And still, our
boundless paranoia cannot be eliminated.
Today, totally objective intelligence gathered by our government leaves no doubt
that the Iraqastani regime continues to be unable to prove that it has destroye
d all those weapons Don Rumsfeld sold them in the 70's so they could wipe out th
e Iranian menace. To be sure, this regime has already used American-produced wea
pons of maxi destruction against not only its worthless Arabiac neighbors, but a
lso the against its own people - the majority of whom it should be noted are Ame
rica-hating terrorists.
Now some other George Bush might have been content to sit by and pass up an oppo
rtunity to use this scoundrel as an election-winning scapegoat. Well this George
Bush is another story, and he's sick and tired of knowing that Saddam Hussein i
s living it up in the Iraqazoid White House, having himself the kind of good old
booze-and-sex-drenched parties that make Osama bin Laden routinely call for his
ouster. And all the while, he's laughing at my daddy. And THAT is something I c
annot abide. Dare anyone doubt me on that point, I urge them to look at the fact
s:
When former Texas Governor Ann Richards talked shit about my daddy at the Democr
atic Convention, I gave up my cushy life as a baseball team's sure-thing investo
r to show that silver-haired gash what happens when you fuck with the Bush klan.
When Bill Clinton kicked my daddy into the gutter of the one-termer ghetto, I s
pared no expense or energy sending his hand-picked boy Al "Qaeda" Gore packing t
o Prozacville. And when Ari Fleischer once snickered because my dad had a piece
of spinach stuck in his teeth, well I didn't hestiate to grab him by that greasy
horseshoe of scruff he calls hair and get all Goodfellas on his hellbound Jewbo
y ass.
And so today, the first two years of my administration's deceit and political ma
nipulation are now reaching a moment of simulated truth. Saddam Hussein and his
sons must leave Iraq within 48 hours. Their refusal to do so will result in the
personal vendatta-inspired military conflict that has been a foregone conclusion
since the day of my near-election. Indeed, the hour of my blood dynasty's desis
sification is near.
And hear me well: I don't care how many colored American GI's or sub-human Musla
mian babies get killed, Saddam – so long as I never have to spend another Kenne
unkport Thanksgiving watching my pathetic old man sob like a woman over not havi
g had the balls to take you out when it was legally legitimate to do so.
That is the future I have chosen. Plutocracies have a duty to perpetuate themsel
ves by uniting against the conveniently demonized and almost effortlessly defeat
ed. And tonight, as we have done before, the Republican Party embraces that cour
se of least resistance.
Good night, and may God continue to bless my re-election prospects.
--
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