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发信人: eeric (流云), 信区: Music
标 题: Courtney Love在Kurt葬礼上的悼词
发信站: BBS 荔园晨风站 (Thu Apr 5 16:36:12 2001), 转信
I don't know what to say. I feel the same way you guys do. If you guys
don't think... to sit in this room where he played guitar and sang,
and feel so honored to be near him, you're crazy... Anyway, he left a
note, it's more like a letter to the fucking editor. I don't know what
happened. I mean it was gonna happen, but it could've happened when he
was 40. He always said he was gonna outlive everybody and be a hundred
and twenty. I'm not gonna read you all the note 'cause it's none of
the rest of your fucking business. But some of it is to you. I don't
really think it takes away his dignity to read this considering that
it's addressed to most of you. He's such an asshole. I want you all to
say 'asshole' really loud.
"This note should be pretty easy to understand. All the warnings from
the punk rock 101 courses over the years since my first introduction
to the shall we say, ethics involved with independence and embracement
of your community, it's proven to be very true. "I haven't felt the
excitment of listening to as well as creating music, along with really
writing something, for too many years now.
"I feel guilty beyond words about these things -- for example, when
we're backstage and the light go out and the roar of the crowd begins,
it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who
seemed to love and relish the love and adoration of the crowd."
Well, Kurt, so fucking what -- then don't be a rock star you asshole.
"Which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact that I can't
fool you, any one of you, it simply isn't fair to you or to me. The
worst crime I could think of would be to pull people off by faking it,
pretending as if I'm having 100% fun."
Well Kurt, the worst crime I can think of is for you to just continue
being a rock star when you fucking hate it, just fucking stop.
"Sometimes I feel as I should have a punch-in time-clock before I walk
out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it,
and I do, God believe me I do, but it's not enough. I appreciate the
fact that I and we have effected and entertained a lot of people. I must
be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're
alone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to
regain the enthusiasm I once had as a child. On our last 3 tours I've
had a much better appreciation of all the people I know personally,
and as fans of our music, but I still can't get out the frustration to
gather the empathy I have for everybody. There's good in all of us and I
simply love people too much."
So why didn't you just fucking stay?
"So much that it makes me feel just too fucking sad. Sad little
sensative unappreciative Pieces Jesus man--"
oh shut up.. bastard Why didn't you just enjoy it? I don't know. Then he
goes on to say personal things to me that are none of your damn
business; personal things to Frances that are none of your damn
business.
"I had a good marriage, and for that I'm grateful. But since the age
of seven, I've become hateful toward all humans in general only
because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy."
Empathy?
"Only because I love and feel for people too much I guess Thank you
all from the pit of my burning nauseous stomach for your letters and
concern during the last years. I'm pretty much of an erratic moody
person and I don't have the passion anymore. Peace, Love, Empathy,
Kurt Cobain."
And there is some more personal things that is none of your damn
business. And just remember: this is all bullshit... And I'm laying in
our bed, and I'm really sorry. And I feel the same way you do. I'm
really sorry you guys. I don't know what I could have done. I wish I'd
been here. I wish I hadn't listened to other people, but I did.
Every night I've been sleeping with his mother, and I wake up in the
morning and think it's him because his body's sort of the same.
I have to go know.
Courtney Love
--
爱你,不长
就一生
※ 来源:·BBS 荔园晨风站 bbs.szu.edu.cn·[FROM: 192.168.36.84]
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